Wednesday, March 29, 2017

ABA's Harmful Message to Children: You Can't Say "No"

Image description: a red circle with a slash through it - the "No" symbol

CW/TW: ABA, sexual abuse, autonomy, consent, gaslighting, violence

I haven't posted here in a while because I was going through another bad funk, but now that I have the spoons, I'm ready to talk the harmful massage that ABA gives to children.

If you've read my previous posts The Dangers of ABA Part 1 and Part 2, you already know why ABA is harmful to people, but what I didn't mention was what ABA teaches children: that they can't say "No", that they must say "Yes" or "OK" to everything that someone tells them if they want to be liked or accepted by anyone, which is extremely dangerous.

When I was 11 years old, I was sitting on the school bus with a girl whom I thought was my "best friend", and she molested me.  I don't remember what happened immediately after that - probably because I blocked it out of my memory.

I kept this hidden from my mother for 15 years because I was so ashamed that I let it happened.  I finally told her last month.  She asked me how I wanted to handle it, and I said that I wanted to work it out in therapy.  So I told my therapist the next time I saw her, about the ABA and the molestation, but she said that ABA wasn't abuse.  She also said something about the molestation that wasn't very reassuring.  I don't remember what that was because I blocked that out too.

What therapists, psychiatrists and other "professionals" fail to understand is that ABA is abuse, and it is harmful - children are under the impression that their feelings, their body, and their identity doesn't belong to them, that they belong to other people.  ABA teaches children that they're to please other people no matter what, which is wrong.

Far too often, disabled people are the victims of violence and abuse.  According to the World Health Organization, disabled children are four times more likely to be the victims of violence than abled children, and adults with psychiatric disabilities are four times more likely to be victims of violence than those who aren't psychiatrically disabled.

So please, don't continue to defend ABA after you've read this.

Thank you.

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